Tips for New Parents

by Sheila Somerlock Ruth, MyCinnamonToast.com
It happened to me about 6 or 7 months into my pregnancy - that sudden realization that in just a
few short months, my husband and I would be completely and totally responsible for the care of a new baby. Until that time, I had been focused on the details of the pregnancy: the changes in my body, the development of the fetus inside me, and our plans for the delivery. I hadn't really
thought about what would happen when we came home from the hospital with our new baby. Panic set in. Would we know what to do? What if we made mistakes?
In a frenzy, I dragged my husband to a parenting class. I didn't learn very much from the class.
About all I remember of it was pretending to bathe a doll. But it did give me some confidence that, just maybe, I could do this parenting thing after all. In truth, nothing can really prepare you for parenting. It's strictly on-the-job training. No matter what you learn or know about parenting, your children will surprise you and force you to learn new things and come up with creative solutions. So, while it is important to learn as much as we can about taking care of these small beings that have been entrusted to us, it's also important to realize that it's not like studying for a test. We don't have to know everything! But in case you're feeling edgy, as I was, here's some tips to help you get started on your parenting journey:
1. Trust your instincts! No matter what the books say, no matter what the doctors say, in the
end it comes down to you. You have to do what you think is right, even if it goes against what
everyone else is saying. Remember that 40 years ago, breastfeeding was frowned on, and those
mothers who did nurse their children had to go against powerful social pressure to do what they
thought was right. Now of course, we know that nursing your child is one of the best things that
you can do to give them a good start. Will you make mistakes? Probably. But most of the mistakes parents make do not cause lasting damage.
2. Read as much as you can. While it is important to trust your instincts, it is also important to have a lot of information to draw on in making your decisions. You shouldn't necessarily take
anything you read as absolute truth; many parenting books will offer conflicting advice on any
given subject. If you rely on only one book, even a good one, then you are not getting the whole
story. But if you read a lot of books and articles, you can use the knowledge you've gained to make up your own mind. There are things I wish that I had known about when my child was a baby that I didn't learn until much later.
3. Be thorough about childproofing. If there is one area in which mistakes can have a lasting
impact, it is safety. Don't delay; you'll be surprised at how quickly most babies become mobile.
4. Buy a good pediatric health reference. My husband and I have consulted ours more than
once in the middle of the night. It can sometimes help you figure out how to deal with health
issues without having to call the doctor. Just don't get carried away; it's easy to find all sorts of
exotic illnesses that fit your child's symptoms.
5. When in doubt, call the pediatrician, even if it is the middle of the night. If you're not sure if
your child's symptoms are serious, it's always better to call the pediatrician. As you become more experienced, you'll have a better feel for when you need to call the doctor, but in the beginning it's hard to know. If your pediatrician makes you feel stupid for calling, get a new pediatrician. A good pediatrician understands that new parents don't have the experience to know when there is really a problem.
6. Buy a good diaper bag. You'll be carrying it around a lot, so it is important to find one which is
easy to carry and easy to organize. You may even want to consider a backpack which will leave
your hands free (trust me - you'll need them!)
7. You may want to think about using cloth diapers, at least part of the time. Cloth diapers
are better for your baby's skin and may help them to become aware of their bodily functions earlier (an important step in potty readiness). Today's cloth diapers are nothing like those shapeless rags that mothers used to have to make do with. Of course if your baby will be in day care, you will probably have to use disposables there, but you can still use cloth diapers when your baby is home. I used cloth diapers when my son was a baby, except when traveling.
8. Talk, sing, and read to your baby. Although they won't understand what you are saying for a
while, the more they hear language, the better their minds will learn to process it. And the sound
of your voice is comforting to them.
Finally, remember that you are not alone. You are surrounded by people willing to help. Don't be
afraid to ask family and friends for help. And the Internet is not only a wonderful place to find
information, it is a wonderful source of community and support. There are many wonderful
communities of moms and dads on the Internet who help each other out with advice and support. Remember the old saying, that it "takes a village to raise a child." We are lucky to live in a time when the world is our village.